It looks like there’s a weird job offer on the table. Not sure how to regard it, but I’ll certainly hear them out to see what compensation would look like. At this point I’ve only been here for seven years because I haven’t had any compelling competing offers thrown at me. I’m not the moron to say something like “I would never betray my employer”. That’s purely idiotic. I’m always open to better offers. Always. It just happens that I got quite a break. Now that it feels like my career has sort of stalled, I think it might be the opportunity I need to further my career in ways I hadn’t anticipated. But, we’ll see. I’m just as skeptical as I am optimistic, perhaps more so. I suppose I’ll meet with a higher up soon, but I’m also going to be direct and honest. We’ll see.

I’m pretty sure I’ve peaked. Everything I was going to accomplish in my life as far as technology and science, I’ve already achieved. When it comes to learning, programming, and electronics- It’s all downhill from here. That’s it, show’s over. I think a huge portion of the reason for this lies in my job. Every job I’ve had prior to this one has demanded nothing of me intellectually. In order to cope with a need for stimulation, I sat down and learned everything I could about computers, electronics, networking. Now that I get this “stimulation” elsewhere, in fact regularly it’s demanded of me, I find myself not seeking those endeavors anymore. I don’t tinker. I haven’t learned anything new or substantial in over a year. My desire for self improvement is all but gone. It’s a crisis of sorts, and I really don’t know where to go from here.

In a wild turn of events, assholes Jim Jordan, James Comer, and Bryan Steil, are now threatening to defund the Manhattan District Attorney over his handling of the Stormy Daniels bribery case. All because Trump banged Stormy Daniels, paid her to shut the hell up about it, got caught, and became president afterward.

How the fuck are Republicans a thing anymore? They have absolutely no credibility. Honestly, they have a negative credibility balance, it’s time to take out a credibility loan. Just who the fuck are these clowns? Are they fucking serious right now? Do they even care remotely that they look like mafia goons in doing this? That’s what they’ve been reduced to. Seriously. This is asinine.

It’s wild that we’re on the verge of nuclear war. I won’t claim that I care a ton. I suppose an all-out nuclear war would drastically alter (or end) my life, but until the flashes in the sky it’s just a “maybe” at best. We’ve been “on the verge” since laying waste to Hiroshima. As if that’s not stressful enough, you have a racist old man in Florida trying to split the country apart, and succeeding. Can I just say how sad that is, by the way? A fucking moat? To protect someone who throws cash at every threat? Fuck every single one of you awful shitty MAGA losers. You’re fucking morons. Seriously. You’re memes of memes.

I wish I had more capability to write anything outside of “stream of consciousness”. It’s an irritating limitation. I can’t do “deep dives” into anything, really. I can’t be bothered to focus my attention for longer than three minutes on any given subject or task. It’s incredibly deleterious to accomplishing anything, really. Attentiveness feels like torture to my attention-depleted brain. Well, I guess that’s all the time I have to dedicate to that subject. Upward and onward.

Yeah, you can safely ignore blog post titles now. It’s all running together and meaningless unless otherwise stated. I guess that’s fine. Doesn’t seem to bother me much considering I continue to do it. I’m not one for titles, I guess. I sometimes think I have an idea of what I want to write, but then I actually sit down to write and a bunch of stuff I didn’t expect comes out. It’s not the easiest thing in the world for me to stay on topic, or even on task. Fucking ADHD. Anyways.

I fucking love weekends. I never work them, and I typically need the two days of rest in order to recuperate from the insanity of the work week. It’s not just insane during work, but I have kids. They have stuff they do after school. It’s tough to be a parent these days. Back in the 90’s kids didn’t do shit. We were kicked out the front door and told to be home in time for dinner and that was pretty much it. No sports, no dancing or music, just boot us and that’s it. 90’s parents had a pretty sweet setup. Seems like they bitched a lot, though, when they comparatively had it much easier.

I restarted an anxiety medication and I always feel a weird buzz in my brain for the first half hour after it kicks in. I’m not fond of the feeling it produces, but it seems to help quite a bit after the initial buzzing wears off. Has anyone else experienced that with Buspar, I wonder? I’m sure they have. I highly doubt I’m the only person prescribed it that would feel at least some side effect. Seems like we’re a society of side effects these days. Side effects from chemicals released into the environment from manufacture, side effects from prescriptions, and side effects from poor life choices. We’re a veritable cornucopia of aberration. Most of us, anyways. There are a few of us who are actively trying to dodge the pitfalls of an industrial society, but not many. Certainly not enough to count for much.